Refreshing change on a really hot day

[Straight Shooter]

Up to Aldi's this morning looking for stuff to wack on the dehydrator ...picked up some Oranges,Lemons and limes...that's me sorted ...lets get out of here...not so fast buster ....what would you like for lunch....surprise me i say ...and indeed she did.

In the blue corner of the plate

tomato cut into rings salt n pepper topped off with olive oil with a feta cheese hat
cucumber rings salt pepper splash of olive oil.
three full sticks of celery salted and filled with mature cheddar cheese

In the red corner of the plate

Five black pepper crackers , one half roll of mini roule with pineapple and almond cheese.
Red grapes and some red olives.

This filled the plate.....

I am sitting at the table on my deck with a fresh air fan to the left of me blowing on the highest setting under a gazebo sheltered from the sun....out she pops "here you go sweetie " i take a look and think ....this needs my full uninterrupted attention...as i pondered a attack strategy to tame this bastard i decided the best way was the element of surprise.... i went straight in the order of attack just seemed to come natural and without logic....celery stick was the first to fall just snapped of half of him ...i am like a cat playing with a mouse...i scoop up a tomato and cuc combo ...as i chew away ...i turn my attention to the black pepper cracker savoury ..i grab the roule and slice some off then spread it on the cracker ....but that's not enough for me is it ......no ....more celery , some grapes, red olives....i cram in the cracker laced with Roule....i now realise i have a fight on my hands here....then she comes out with a nice cold glass of crisp white wine ...as i try to say thank you bits of cracker cascade down my chin followed by the odd bits of half eaten grape.....i take a slurp ...slide my forearm across my mouth and get to it....this was rather more frenzied than before ....all i can remember from it all was it was so nice.... wifey had to hit me repeatedly with a length of 2" x 4" to prevent me eating even more (off the edge of our nice round oak table top) ....simple but very very nice ......have to fly.....off to A&E for stitches.

[MaryN]

Oh my, I could just taste that lot! Could i just add a nice selection of Italian cured meats.....

[Mortblanc]

I guess all that crap is the British version of fried chicken and mashed potatoes with gravy and butter beans.

[harrypalmer]

MB, you said you have not been to the UK in decades, if you do come over you can see the food revolution that has taken place.

[Straight Shooter]

You sure can add Italian cured meats Mary ! yum......sorry MB you'r suggestion is a bit silly...think more in terms of (hot sunny day) and develop your thesis from there ...and NO hamburgers with cheese seven different mayo's ketchup or mustard with a huge bag of fries on the side.....and no twenty two ltrs of Coca Cola .....you must try harder pal .

[Mortblanc]

I don't have to try harder, I'm already there!

Celery and cucumbers are not food. They are what you give to guests to be rid of them.

I bought a rack of ribs yesterday and they will go on the grill tonight.

I will probably side them with potato salad and some baked beans. The drink will probably be tea, well chilled with crushed ice and probably with some form of fruit added.

Now I know your culture does not appreciate Coca-Cola, but that is a matter of disturbing upbringing and aversion to ice rather than the drink itself. Most of the rest of the world loves and craves the stuff.

[MaryN]

Good God, fried chicken, mashed potatoes, butter beans and gravy?? Do people actually eat that??

[CharlesHarris]

So is it necessary to change the accepted definitions of Heaven and Hell now?

"Heaven is where the police are British, the cooks are French, the
mechanics German, the lovers Italian and it's all organised by the
Swiss. Hell is where the chefs are British, the mechanics French, the
lover's Swiss, the police German and it's all organised by the Italians."

[Straight Shooter]

Think you just clipped my shoulder MB ......had a look ...just a flesh wound ....please don't worry folks ....i'll be fine.....just need some celery.

[harrypalmer]

" cucumbers are not food" ? Best tell McDonalds and other fast food chains, they stick enough of them on burgers et al LOL

Celery? have you not added them to stews, boiled/steamed/sautéed and served as a side vegetable, made into a cream soup?

Not used to ice? ROTFL... you numpty, my fridge has an ice maker, if you don't want ice in a drink you have to say so when you order in pubs and eateries in the UK.