Made the Fat Girl Cry

[Mortblanc]

I was in a camp this past weekend where all manner of information was discussed and all types of lectures and seminars given. One of the subjects was proper diet and fitness, which is standard for this day and age.

The lecture was given by a young lady with a degree in nutrition. I respectfully listened to the pap these people promote as the latest medical fad and left part way through the lecture due to absolute and total boredom.

Latter that evening I was sitting at my campsite having my evening meal, which consisted of about 2 oz of cheddar, about 4-6 oz of sliced turkey and a handful of mixed nuts all washed down with water from the spring (yep its safe) that had been boiled into strong coffee.

The young nutritionist lady was camped nearby and began advising me on my diet protocol, informing me I was not getting a balanced meal and need some carbs and complex something or other to even things out. She also informed me that I needed to boost my metabolism with a bit of exercise.

Now in the past two years I have lost 7 of you British people's "stones" and have kept that amount off successfully. I am at the point in life where age and attrition has more influence on my body than a medical journal's recommendations. I know what will put the weight on me and what I can and can not eat. I also know the limitations of my tired old body and the exercise it can and can not tolerate.

I have discovered a balance point where I can tolerate the diet I need while placing the bare minimum of stress on a bad back that has had three surgeries and does not tolerate "exercise" well.

I also did not mention that the young lady in question was at least 9-10 of your British stones overloaded for her height. Looked something like a pear with legs.

When she stopped her dribble I looked her up and down like a farmer buying a cow at the stock auction and simply asked;

"How's that plan working out for you?"

Poor child went back to her tent and cried.

Reality sucks!