Quick Quiz please

[CharlesHarris]

A sturdy set of chopsticks would make an effective improvised weapon for someone trained in using them in that manner.
I have a set of cased bamboo ones which I carry when I travel. TSA and airport security pay them no attention, but if sufficiently repurposed they could be lethal.

[Tartar Horde]

You have made my day Charles, the mental image of being attacked with chopsticks has made me chuckle, and the press reports even more so.
Charles Harris; AKA "chopstick Charlie" still at large in the Metropolitan area, approach with caution, distinguishing features; Tattoo on left arm "have Wood will travel".

[NorthernRaider]

SPECIAL FEATURE ADVERT IN THIS MONTHS GUNS AND AMMO, " Buy our special titanium, tactical assault system chopsticks and get a free tactical pouch for your webbing PLUS one to carry your Assault Systems Prawn Crackers in ."

[Tartar Horde]

Camo chopsticks, it's genius, you know the Americans will buy them (charles H, is of course an exception and is known for his impecable taste) lol

[NorthernRaider]

The next day you will see some pathetic creature from the Labour Party on TV demanding action to ban these deadly implements saying " Only trained specialists should be allowed to carry chopsticks in public". Followed by some retarded single parent loser with her 10 year old son Tarquin- Magnum- Tyler with a plaster on his pinkie after picking up a splinter from a cheap chopstick and mum saying " his life has been ruined he needs disability money and I need compo to care for him, we are going on Jeremy Kyle tomorrow to ask for crowdfunding as well". This will be followed by TV AM the Daily Mirror and the Guardian all running article about how easy it is for children to get chopsticks.

[Tartar Horde]

That's two "C" s in impeccable by the way.

[NorthernRaider]

BREAKING NEWS ISIL supporters in China seen handling Chopsticks!!! Dianne Abbott and John Mc Donnall on TV demanding a ban on all Chinese goods to UK.

Len McClusky announces that all Union members will now eat their Chinese take away's ONLY with their fingers, When a reporter asked about eating Peking Duck and Shark Fin soup McClusky said it was the Tories fault for not putting it in paper cups and he called an immediate walk out of all union members after 3 out of 250,000 members voted in favour of strike action.

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The following day Nicola Sturgeon announced that no Chinese products would be allowed to be sold in Scotland, including clothes, shoes, toilet paper, baby wipes, soap and shampoos. " We Scots will no longer use Soap, Shampoo or toilet paper" A hack from the Daily Mail got kicked sensless by the SNPs community cohesion minister ( on bail for fiddling expences) for daring to suggest that was normal in Scotland in jest.

The Tory Candidates Goldsmith Z and Johnson B are currently under investigation for apparently bulk buying 10 million left handed chopsticks for distribution to the NHS and Schools but planned on charging £20 EACH for the right handed versions.

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Nigel Farage and Paul Nuttall were last night spotted dining in an banned underground Chinese Restaurant and were snapped using banned Chopsticks.

[Tartar Horde]

Oh the irony NR if this scenario wasn't all too predctable eh

[Steve]

Are chopsticks available with bayonet fittings ? I think one would make a useful addition to my .308 scout rifle.

[NorthernRaider]

Steve didn't know you were a fan of Colonel Cooper, I salute you Sir.

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I'm a fan of lightweight scout rifles usually in 223.