Tales from the bottom shed

[Straight Shooter]

Just came up from the shed ....all finished.

It all started yesterday, walking around Aldi s ....i say to wifey " Why do we need strong flour to bake bread then ? " 75p for strong flour 45p for self raising and plain flour.....wifey said why don,t you try making some out of it then ...you incredible good looking bastard .....sooooo i said i will then boy bach !.....fast forward.....its 5.25 am ....up i get ...coffee,fag ....fag coffee... i shout up ...cuppa tea sweetie .....not yet darling its a little early ( she actually said something completely different ) i drop off watching the news....its now 9.10 am ...i hit the shower....dress ....toast coffee fag.....wifey is off to our daughters ....i wave bye....the kitchen is mine ....all mine.... first order of biz is to light up the Rayburn cooking range down the bottom shed....yes i did clean the oven Girls !....its alight i stick some coal on....the kitchen is spotless as it always is ...until i let loose....first up self raising flour 700 g i sieve the four into the scales.....then empty into the mixing bowl of the mixer ...then i add two teaspoons of fine sea salt and one packet of died yeast and fold it in....400 mil of warm water ....i make a pond in the middle and pour in and fold the mixture ...i hold some water back .....i attach the the d hook and turn on the mixer to min i add the rest of the water and let the mixer do its stuff for 5 mins ...i add a spot of oil into the china bowl and paint around the inside till its all coated......mixer off ....turn out the mix into the bowl cover with clingfilm and set aside near the wood burner to prove....after about an hour its double the size....i sprinkle some flour on the worktop ...turn out the dough onto the floured worktop and head butt it for 2 mins then fold in a few chops slice it in two smack it about a bit....i oil the bread tins and drop in the dough....i cover with cling film and set them aside to prove up.....back down the shed ....the temp is now 450 and steady.....after about 45 mins the dough in the tins have proved ....i place the two tins on a baking tray .... cup with 5 ice cubes and a sharp knife..... down the bottom shed i go.....i strike the dough with the knife...place both tins on the mid position of oven ....drop out the ice on the baking tray and slide in on the bottom shelf of the oven and shut the door. Thirty mins later two golden brown crispy loafs of bread ....back to the kitchen turn out the loafs onto a cooling frame ....now time for the plain flour ....i do the exact same mix and method .....but the plain flour loafs seem to have faired better on size and look better , So what do they taste like SS i hear you say....the self raising loafs are fine .....the plain loafs are still cooling but i will try later with some pat,e with some cheese sprinkled on top ....under grill for 3 mins and watch jools strut his stuff....sooooo you can bake bread using this flour but i will assess it tomorrow in full and get back to you all ....happy new year folks.....P.S. the kitchen looks like someone lopped a stun grenade in there .....have to work fast she will return by 7 pm . SS