Urban Raiders

[Scythe13]

(29 January 2012, 15:38)bigpaul Wrote: and you'd get a clip around the ear from your dad when you did get home(and rightly so!)

I remember when the local policeman would smack you around the ear, grab you by it, take you back to your house, then tell your dad what happened, and then he'd slap you round the ear as well!!! I'll tell you what, that taught me many lessons in life about doing something wrong and the consequences. But more than anything, it did teach me something more important...
how not to get caught haha.

[g79]

(29 January 2012, 15:30)Carnebwen Wrote: Dont you have to actually put signs up these days saying "caution barbed wire" if you actually used it. This is to stop poor little Timmy from hurting himself when he was trying to steal the lead off your rood, or nick your Quad. "My poor, poor, innocent angel! he was destined to be a quality sergeon or concert pianist and now his hands are ruined."

I prefer the 80s when you just didnt fuck with someone elses house/garden/fields. That and we could also own guns much more easily.

When you see someone has tried to get over the fence(blood) take them down for a few days.

[NorthernRaider]

The law requires you to put a notice up to warm people of the hazard from the barbed wire etc, what it does not specify is its size !!!

[Tartar Horde]

I did think about using some old sea fishing hook into the board above the gate, right big n nasty rusty hooks with large barbs, but that's just cruel

[00111001]

Dig a 4 foot deep trench on your side of the fence, only needs to be a foot wide. Your 7 foot fence now provides an 11 foot drop, put some rubble in there, broken bricks etc and whoever lands there is probably looking at a painful landing, maybe a break.

Then you can teach him to tapdance.

---

Or if you were planting some climbing plants in the trench, you could get away with some spikes in there, or maybe some hollow metal tubing, about 1" in diameter. Maybe you chuck your broken bottles in the trench too, to help with drainage or something.

[Skean Dhude]

Make it 6 feet and leave the earth on the edge so you can just push it it. The screams won't last long.

[00111001]

The crazy lady who owned our local corner shop got robbed years ago. The old bill did nowt, even though it was general knowledge who the scrote was who broke in.

She took serious umbrage to this, and installed her own Anti-Scrote door. It consisted of:

One Metal garden gate (the full size ones that fill a doorway)
One lamp
One piece of Wire.

Install the gate in the doorway
Take the lamp, rip the wires out and chuck the lamp away.
Take the fuse out of the plug, replace with wire
Attach the wire to the gate and plug into the wall socket (make sure it's not turned on first)

Hey presto - AS Gate installed.

The next part was her fatal error. After the construction of the device, she was very proud of it. She'd show the regulars what she'd made. Word spread, so the old bill called in to find out if it was true. Like a muppet she said "Yes, took me all day to make it - if that little f*cker comes back he'll fry before he gets in"

They threatened to arrest her (I'm not sure on what grounds - maybe stupidity) unless she removed it. Silly cow let her husband take the whole thing down. All she legally had to do was unplug it!

Not a bad idea though

[Skean Dhude]

It is illegal to set an automatic trap that is indiscriminate in what it kills. A child, plod or someone from the emergency service may trigger it. This is a general No No.

Now, even if she was to put it on a switch and got the sctote his family could then sue. See Mr Martin for full details.

The way around it seems to be join Plod and then you get to shoot all the scrotes you want... Oh, maybe not.

You take a big risk in this mickey mouse country defending your home, property or yourself.

[Scythe13]

We live under a protectionless protectinist system.

F**K THAT!!! I'm carrying around my own personal defence device. If someone wants to jump me, they can make their own way to the hospital, dragging themselves on the floor with broken legs.

If someone wants to break into my house...they will be severely damaged, with bits of bone sticking out....I will then call the ambulance service to pick them up, but I'm new to the area and might be give the wrong address. It's not that I want them to suffer. It's just that I paniced. How am I to know he's still suffering?

[00111001]

(30 January 2012, 16:53)Scythe13 Wrote: We live under a protectionless protectinist system.

F**K THAT!!! I'm carrying around my own personal defence device. If someone wants to jump me, they can make their own way to the hospital, dragging themselves on the floor with broken legs.

If someone wants to break into my house...they will be severely damaged, with bits of bone sticking out....I will then call the ambulance service to pick them up, but I'm new to the area and might be give the wrong address. It's not that I want them to suffer. It's just that I paniced. How am I to know he's still suffering?

I always wondered if these idiots tell there mates what house they're breaking into before they do it?

If anyone decided to let themselves into my house I consider them my property. I might just decide to keep 'em.