What do you have to hand now?

[Skean Dhude]

BM, So a dog and a kid then.

[BeardyMan]

BM, So a dog and a kid then.

That was a facetious answer, no one really needs to know exactly what I have in store for them!
But if we're being slightly more serious then the SFA is hanging on a hook right by the front door, there are a few goodies in the front room, the kitchen obviously has 2 draws full of knives or other assorted items that can be used to defend oneself, there's something at the top of the stairs, my bedside table has a draw entirely dedicate to sharp things (I use a chest of draws as my bedside table as the draws are huge!) then there's all the goodies in the shed. Needless to say should anyone come in uninvited then they're not going to be leaving unaided unless I decide they can.
Winston is the first line of defence though, when he goes mental then it's a serious issue to stop him

[Skean Dhude]

I know. You joked and I joked back. Most people would be cowed just by the dog. Rotties instill fear by their sheer size and looks.

[Ian Haines]

In terms of deliberated upon self-defence implements, I have 66 items.
In terms of bystander adaptable self-defence items in my home, I have 42.
In the interests of security, I won't describe or name any of them.

God bless the BIC biro, though, and don't ya just lurrrrv kettle leads? Paperweights inside socks? Salt/pepper dispensers wrapped up inside a tea-towel? Short dumbbell bars, unladen? I'll leave out nail guns, cordless power drills, laser pens and soggy bus tickets (just kidding with the last one, of course. Therapy never seemed to really 'cut-it' with me, somehow! I really should dig my psychiatrist up, though. After 7 years, he must be wanting to take another breath, by now!) This thread is kinda fun!

[BeardyMan]

Those powdered fire extinguishers are good fun. I certainly wouldn't want to get a face full of that, then beaten round the head repeatedly with an empty cannister...

Oven cleaner is a good one too. We all need clean ovens. Yes officer, I was cleaning the oven at 0330 when the intruder walked into the kitchen.
They will do permanent damage though (read the warnings on the can) and come out in a wonderful foam. Nice and sticky

[bigpaul]

baseball bat.

[Straight Shooter]

That's why I admire BP ....always to the point plain and simple and always steadfast.........but I will bet you lots of other little nasty things await unsuspecting sheeple types .....rather you than me....there again I have lots of real nasty little bits n bobs going on....not for printing here though.

[Mortblanc]

It has always intrigued me that in GB, where absolutely no one plays baseball,

Baseball bats are one of the top selling sporting goods!

[bigpaul]

when I was in secondary school we used to play a game called "rounders" which uses a similar bat and is somewhat similar to baseball .

[Karidian]

Discounting knives, machetes, crossbows etc. Im quite impressed with the resourcefulness displayed here. I wouldnt have thought of a kettle lead but once its pointed out to me i can see how useful as an improv weapon that could be. Personally i have my old Kendo Bokken at the side of the bed. 3' of solid oak shaped like a sword instead of a baseball bat. I like the idea of deep heat spray as improvised mace too lol.